I've seen other people do this, I thought I would do one too. I don't really know why it started to be honest. It just came over me like a wave. It started when I was in year 5-6 as I just started to feel.. empty. By year 7, I was having panic attacks commonly and tried to kill myself twice. Then the anorexia came along. I just felt so ugly, so different. Self harm had started taking over my life at this point. I would cut on a regular basis. Others view it as cutting yourself for no reason. I view it as an escape from depression and reality. I was getting more and more bio oil - luckily, this was without my parents knowing. They were completely clueless. Some people have asked me: what does it feel like? Well, it feels like this: you are walking along a beach into the sea - depression has blinded you. The water is just lapping over your feet, but as you walk further under water, your head gets covered. Cutting is like someone bringing you up to the surface for one second, a precious second to breathe. No one knew, except from my ex-bestfriends, Scott and Aakifah. I knew that if I did kill myself, I would not bee in the good books of my religion. It was worth a shot. I went to church every few days after school to pray. I guess the fact that no one in authority knew made it worse. No antidepressants, no xanax being taken, nothing. I began to take my blades in to school. My anorexia has only just cleared itself up. I can now eat a McDonalds meal without feeling like I wanted to binge. Not long ago - maybe half a month ago - I relapsed. I was doing so well. I hadn't self harmed for a long time. But that day, thoughts of suicide engulfed me. And as everyone else slept, I made about 25 cuts that one night. I'm pulling through. I think. I might make it, I may not. I can't be certain either way. I just want you to all know that I'm here for you, and each and everyone on this forum is beautiful and unique in their own way. ~Matt
Matt. Suicide isn't worth it. Every time I attempted it, I was saved, and when I thought back, it isn't worth it. Depression is hard to go through, I understand. But suicide is a weak man's escape. We're all weak at one point in our lives, but no one wants to die weak. Stay strong, buddy
Matt. I know I'm probably a stranger to you, but never think that way. Suicide isn't worth it, as XD said. I also have attempted it, as I had thought I was worthless to the world. But I'm not. So you aren't either.
I'm pretty lucky to have not experienced such persistent sadness, but in the times I am down and low, I just focus on the positive things. Suicide is never worth it. It is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. No matter how bad it gets, just push forward and know it'll be over soon. Everyone has ups and downs, some higher than normal, some lower than normal, but that's how things go in life. You never know what's coming next, no matter how much you think you do.
PM me if you'd like to talk. We've discussed this topic before. Just remember I'll always have time to help you through these problems if need be. c:
Suicide really is not worth it, but remember I am always here to talk if you need it- I'm normally up til 1am but I'd stay up longer if it meant helping
I'm so sorry for you ;-; But don't commit suicide. Ever. There's always tomorrow. It will get better, trust me. I had depression and anxiety at the start of the year. It was horrible, awful. If you want to get better I need you to do these things: You need to get your parents to give you some medicine that allows your thinking to actually happen. You need to create strategies for yourself. Think of something positive everyday. Organise to catch up with someone. Organise a sleepover. You need to understand that all these feelings go away. You need to stop cutting. When I had depression, I felt I was never going to get better. But trust me, I did. I'm always feeling great everyday. I'm enjoying my life. You need to fill up your days. Don't let yourself think too much, that will make you cut and stuff. And I repeat, cutting, just makes it worse. It's scientifically proven. I saw something that you said like you didn't have many friends IRL. You need to get them. They'll help you a lot. And trust me, being infront of a screen and on the forums and stuff doesn't help. It seems like it does, but it doesn't. It's just a bunch of stuff on a screen. It will get better. But you also have to work for that. I wish you the best. ~Arch
Stay strong I know I might not be one of your closest friends, or friend at all, but if you want someone to talk to then I am here Just Pm me or /msg me on .org/.net I hope things get much better for you in the near future
I'm trying Can I be a unicorn pls Thanks :3 My internet shuts off at 8:30PM - my dad's like so unfair. But thanks slum buddy 33 I can't get friends, though. That's the thing.
You need to try what I said. Trust me. Do you think I got over anxiety and stuff just by doing nothing? What I said to do is exactly what I did.
That's like, So. Freaking. Cute 3 Just remember, Suicide isn't the way to get out of it, Good friends are If you ever want to talk, like I said, Just Pm me or whatever
It doesn't matter how hard it is. Put the knife away, whenever you pull it out, tell yourself there is another way. It doesn't matter if it's as hard as giving up candy or cigarettes or alcohol. You need to stop it.
