Top 5 Reasons Why Myrmidous Should be Fried:

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by xphstos37, May 24, 2017.

  1. xphstos37
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    xphstos37 Experienced Member

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    That is not a type-o, I am just trying to be click-baity as I do believe deep-fried Myrmidous would be an attention-getter AND would go well with ketchup.
    This is my list of the top 5 reasons why Myrmidous should be f i r e d...but first, here is a song with directions written under it to set the mood:


    Just scream "NOT" before every "next to you"
    and throw some random swear-words into the lyrics.

    5. He hasn't called me a "hoser" ONCE since he got mod.
    Ever since the recently-*departed KhalDrogo disappeared/*split after I asked/*told him to *marry me and my BFF Frederic Haggis-Kiss Cirederf the 128th has been MIA, all I'd been left with for some occasional highly jovial banter was the one and the only, the furriest of butts ever, the Myrmidous. Now he is too busy to post on my wall so I have NO one to point a finger and laugh at, and less importantly but equally upsetting, no one to swear at me for making them cry.
    This is unacceptable. The only solution to this problem I can think of is his being demoted. Or someone making Drogo marry me. Or everyone supporting my "FundToFindFrederic" cause by helping me reach my goal of 9,000,000 Deutch francs and 12 beacons. (...)

    4. He called me "Ms. os" the other day. "Ms. os".
    Which is two steps down from his normal level of lazy - - -> "Ms Stos". I mean, no capital, even? Being a mod is destroying his syntax and diction? Somebody, anybody, fire him QUICK, I don't want to end up a "M." again, that was how we met. He called me "Sir" so I called him, "Ma'am". He corrected me so I called him Ma'am again. *giggles & flexes

    3. He isn't drinking as much.
    He told me he never logged on without a good stiff drink at hand, or at least that is what I think he said...I could barely read his typing. NOW, I CAN!!! All the fun of trying to figure out what the #@%&* he means is gone. This sucks, and I am considering taking up needlepoint if I don't see him hanging out on forums more often. I mean it. Don't try and stop me. I'm serious. Needlepoint. Last warning.

    2. He makes kids cry.
    I believe Myrmidous would be uber competent at any job he did, so I imagine he has dazzled all the rest of the mod team to the point that half of them are huddling in the corner of the mod vault, crying, wishing they were him, or half of him, preferrably the top half. Or they're glad they aren't him, but wish they were 3/8 as good as he at his job, or even 1/4 as good. And a couple think they only need to be 1/8th as good, though they should *aim for a *bigger *piece of the *pie. *wink wink, nudge nudge

    1. He is light-headed and raises his pinky finger when he drinks tea.
    Say no more? M. Myrmidous needs to be demoted for this reason, above all. Sure, I miss being called a hoser, but I can handle it, eh? And I don't mind being called "Ms. os" as much as I mind being called "Sir". And I miss a tipsy Myrm, but only a little. And I also make little kids cry so I already know I am 14/15 the furball he is...but there is no cure for being light-headed and someone needs to break his pinky finger, or tape it down, or tie weights to it, or twist his wrist or something. See, in different countries, raising your pinky finger when you drink tea means you are the worst type of human being there is out there, but that is a different Top 5 list....

    In summation, Mr. Myrm, got any good movie suggestions for me? I'm bored.

    Fluff 'n Stuff,
    Ms. os.

    P.S. Some things I'm thinking of making for the mod team, you likey?:
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  2. Myrmidous
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    Myrmidous Well-Known Member Premium

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    Fried.jpg

    For just a moment, I was delicious.

    Regards,
    //Myrmidonut
     
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  3. athyrix
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    athyrix Senior Member Premium

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    I thought that dad fired and I was like NOOOOOO in my head
     
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  4. Wolfie
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    Wolfie Well-Known Member

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    Whatt?? Support?
     
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  5. Teeler
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    Teeler i am kenough

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    What in tarnation?
     
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  6. 52Phenomenon
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    52Phenomenon Super Moderator Super Moderator Events Manager

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    "Top 5 Reasons Why Myrmidous Should Be Fried"
    I personally think he tastes better microwaved, but sure.

    :tearsofjoy::tearsofjoy::tearsofjoy:
     
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  7. TVFilthyFrank
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    TVFilthyFrank Active Member

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    Support, this application is extremely well written, and I like your attitude kid! gl


    I i i if you can't tell, this is a joke
     
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  8. Lycel
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    Lycel Senior Member

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    I think a fried Myrmidous would be far better than the raw, uncooked Myrmidous we see daily. A cooked Myrmidous would last longer when preserved and is far less likely to give us food poisoning. After some research on what the Giant Panda tastes like, I can conclude that slathering him in oil and frying him until he's a greasy ball of nothing is the best way to go: "...He told the judge that his wife cooked the meat with turnips, but they didn’t enjoy it, so he fed some to his pigs and gave the remainder to his sister..." but "[he] didn’t explain what made the meat so unpalatable in what appears to be the only written description of panda-eating." though it's likely because 99% of what they eat is bamboo.
    So, support. I would love to see a fried Myrmidous in the future.
     
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  9. ILostMyKeys
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    ILostMyKeys Active Member

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    Myrmidous is better if you marinate him for a little while, then salt him. Also add some whiskey, and poof, a tasty meal.
     
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  10. Krissy
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    Krissy Stray Kids everywhere all around the world Administrator Discord Administrator Premium Premium

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    I didn't know we were into eating humans :eek:
     
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  11. xphstos37
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    xphstos37 Experienced Member

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