Cuz that stranger is ur real mum

Mum why is dad twerking wtf

 

Because that's his job

Mommy why did daddy cry?

 

Because.. Because... He was chopping onions.

Mummy, Why did Daddy hide in my closet and say "THE PASSAGE TO NARNIA HAS BEEN SEALED!?"?

 

Because he was locking the wardrobe in your closet, which he put illegal drugs in.

Mummy, why haven't I seen daddy for 2 months?

 

He dead.

Mummy, Why is daddy holding a green hand shaped flower with spikes?

 

Because grandma got ran over by a reindeer, and she loved that flower so he took it to her funeral.

Mommy, why is daddy banning me from skyblock.org?

 

X'D Hold up! Grandma was a drug addict. XDD

 

Continuing...
Because he wants you to play only in .net.

Mommy why is daddy in the basement 3 hours every day with the door locked, making suspicious sounds?

 

He is watching Pawn Stars! Where people buy things and sell them!

Mommy, Why is Daddy about to jump off a cliff?

 

Because of you.

Mommy, why did daddy want me to play in .net?

 

bc dad has pixel fetishes. now honey be a good girl and don't tell him i said that ok

mum whyd dad eat the cookies i left for santa

 

That's because he is Santa.

 

Because IDK.

Mommy, why does daddy go to work?

 

So he can afford deez nuts

Mommy why did daddy lick you there?

 

Because he wants a baby.

Mommy, why did daddy sleep with you?

 

Because he didn't have a bed.

Mommy, why is daddy dressed up so fancy on a Saturday?

 

That wasn't a fancy costume.. that was his serial killer costume..

Mommy, why did daddy say there isn't a rotten smell in the basement when there is?

 

We ran out of money and food

Mommy why is daddy racist?

 

Because he is...

Mommy, Why are you and Daddy not wearing clothes in bed?

 

You said you wanted a brother
Mommy, why does daddy have two wives