THE FALL FISHA myth by Nala indentAs the leaves turned golden brown, and the plants withered, Bear; a big, chunky, maple-brown grizzly bear, searched far and wide, day and night, for food to eat before his winter hibernation. For long ago, prey in the Alaskan forest was very scarce, and at the time of Bear there were no fish that swam in the river. The river was barren and dangerous and frightened away all woodland creatures. indentBut as Bear searched one bright, sunny day, the clouds darkened and the pine trees began to sway in the blasting wind. A drizzle began. The rain dampened the leaves of the forest floor, trickling onto the stubby brown mushrooms that swarmed with hungry ants. indentAs minutes and hours ticked by, the rain grew into a storm, pounding onto gentle Mother Earth and rushing all creatures into their homes, except for Bear. He was still searching, and in the midst of the rain he got lost, the water blinding him. His fur was soaked through and hung in clumps. Bear struggled to lift his paws from the muddy ground; for he was famished and exhausted. As he thumped around heavily, he ran into the river. The water swooshed and swirled around his paws, flooding the banks and dragging Bear into the flood. As Bear gasped for air, for life, the gray sky eventually faded, and all went black. indentWhen Bear awoke, he saw that he was on the other side of the river. He stood up, brushed himself off, and looked around. There was no way to get back across to the other bank. He sat down with a thump hopelessly. All food and prey lived on the other side. Surely he would starve to death before winter could even come. indentAll this time Mother Earth kept an eye on Bear. She saw how he trekked day and night, searching for food to keep him going. She observed all of his silly mishaps. But the one thing she was so astounded by was Bear’s determination. For that, she decided to grant him one wish. indentWhen night fell upon the Alaskan forest, and the owls hooted from their ancient trees, Mother Earth whispered with the wind into Bear’s ear. indent“Have no worries, dear Bear. By the rushing waves of the river, by the whispers of the willow trees, and by the song of the spring bird; I grant you one wish. Now, tell me, young son.” indentBear looked up at the twinkling stars, startled. Then he took a deep breath, and spoke to the chilly wind. indent“I wish for something to eat. Something I can enjoy and something that others of my kind can too, in the harsh times of autumn.” indent“Very well. Sleep soundly tonight, dear child, and when dawn arrives, you shall have your wish.” indentThe next morning, right when the sun started to rise and the sky turned a bright pink, the river’s current calmed and Bear woke to the sweet song of the spring bird. As he trudged to the river to give himself a wash, there he found something that caught his eye. Some kind of creature was zipping through the water! indentBear pounced and hopped, trying to catch the strange creature. His spirit instantly lifted. Suddenly the river’s water flew up into the sky, the drops flying into the sky and stopping for a moment. Those droplets magically turned into even more of those strange creatures, and came raining down on top of Bear. indentBear was so hungry he grabbed one and ripped it apart, swallowing rapidly. Its juicy meat squirted into the water and around Bear’s scarred muzzle. He instantly took to hunting more of the water creatures. indent“They are called… fish,” the wind whispered. indentFish. Those creatures became known as fish. Soon, Bear was stuffed more than needed for his hibernation. Later on the word spread that fish came to the river. Bears of all kinds trekked to the Alaskan river to eat fish for the winter. Year after year, salmon fish came back to lay eggs in the river during fall when bears came to search for food. There they spent time together and mingled, enjoying the fall instead of looking all over Alaska. This soon became known as the annual Salmon Run. indentSoon the river was crowded with woodland creatures, and Mother Earth was overjoyed to see her children all together, in peace, once more. Please leave feedback on what you thought! And yes it's for a grade, so aah!!
Perhaps in the first paragraph mention the fact your introduced character, Bear, lives in the Alaskan Forest before mentioning it. You have an unnecessary comma in a compound predicate. If you want to know where that is, that's "dangerous," My class just ended, but I can keep looking next class
